Monday, December 13, 2010

Bed Bugs and Vampires

Bed bugs are real. We have spent the last three years fighting them in our apartment. With the landlords help, right now I will say there is an armistice. My personal feelings are, between them and cockroaches. I will take cockroaches. You clean the house and lay down some poison. The cockroaches leave. Bed bugs, hide and hibernate until they can strike again.

They are blood suckers. They have evolved to feed off humans. You won't find them on animals. They might hitch a ride, but they will not be feeding. They come at night. So you can see the connection to vampires immediately.

But my theory has to do with the bite marks that vampires are supposed to leave. Most lore mentions small marks on the neck. It bothered me. If you seen a dog bite, or even a human bite, you know that the marks are not small. They are not dots. They look horrible. The skin bruises and the wounds are ragged.

So why small marks?

It wasn't until last summer when I got bitten on the neck by bed bugs, did I see the connection. There on my neck were small wounds. Right along the jugular. I had my own vampire bite. Some people wondered if I had done the bites to myself because of my books. I was embarrassed by them, more than anything.

Not me, but a good example of what the bites look like.

So what do you think? Would some people wake up in the morning, feeling a bit tired (they can wake you up if they are really hungry), and see the marks on their neck, think a vampire came in the night?

Only I don't think a vampire bite will itch and last for days.  Stupid bugs.

The only saving grace of these little vampires, is that they do not transmit diseases. Whereas real vampires, being dead, might be full of stuff that could make you sick.  But that being said. I would rather have the real vampire. At least I can put garlic around the house and they will leave. Not like the bed bugs. Grr stupid bugs.


  1. Thank God we haven't been hit by the bedbug epidemic here, but I can totally see your point. It would definitely be something that could have added to the vampire mythos.

  2. Mistaking bed bug bites for vampire bites seems reasonable to me [assuming belief in vampires]. But why do you think a vampire bite would not itch? After all, you state they, "might be full of stuff that could make you sick." And I imagine it would be easy to ignore a little itching what with being haunted by creatures in the night and chased by people wanting to drive a stake through your heart.

  3. My husband almost didn't agree to go to New York because of the bed bug epidemic...and of course, when I was booking a hotel room the hotel next store was just reporting them. Ugh! The darn things remind of fleas, but bigger and more mean. I can totally agree with the vampire connection...but the vampires seem so much more romantic, don't ya think?

  4. Vampires can be a lot more "fun" than the bed bugs. At least with vampires you have to invited them in. The bed bugs are rude! They come inside make themselves at home and get nasty.

  5. Three years of bed bugs--awful! I would take the vampires, too. I am sorry you had those embarrassing marks on your neck.